4 Major Life Skills Successful Kids Should Know

Learn four major life skills successful kids should know regardless of their career or life choices.

Moms Crushing It with CanCan Quick Steps

As we packed my son up for his trek back to college, we talked about the exciting year ahead. My favorite and most unexpected part of our conversation was when he talked about the skills he had learned that fostered his independence and success while away from home. Be still my mother’s beating heart—he was admitting that how he was raised positively impacted his life.

Here are four of the major life skills he referred to:

1.      Become a Lifelong Reader

2.      Set Goals

3.      Develop Strong People Skills

4.      Cultivate Self-Care

Successful Lifelong Skills

Tip 1: Become a Lifelong Reader

Reading is one of the best tools to expand knowledge. Books and articles are available in print and online, covering millions of topics. At the same time, reading increases your vocabulary and helps motivate you because you can read about other successful people who rely on books to grow and learn.

The reading habits of hugely successful people like Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, and Oprah Winfrey prove how books can act as gateways to learning and knowledge.

There are many reasons that reading is such a vital, lifelong skill. At the top of the list is simply how enjoyable a good read is. We can temporarily escape from the stressors of our daily lives when we dive into an interesting book. I’ve always referred to my quiet time with a favorite book as a mini-vacation from life. The best part is I don’t need to pack, book a flight, or update my passport—and other than the cost of the book, it’s absolutely free! I always have a book in my car, my tote bag, or someplace like the kitchen island.

My kids have grown up watching me read nearly every day. I also read to them as they grow up, which makes a positive impression on them.

Because of my love of reading, I assumed my eight kids would follow suit, but that wasn’t the case. My kids who had learning challenges especially struggled with reading. One of my sons would’ve preferred cleaning our bathrooms every day if it meant he didn’t have to pick up a book.

Though we had to work harder at encouraging and helping to support our three weaker readers, once they finally began reading on a regular basis, it opened many new doors for them that otherwise would’ve remained closed.

Check out your local library for Story Times and other reading programs for kids of all ages. Get your children their own library cards to encourage reading about their interests. Also, see CanCan Mom’s Book Recommendations List for children as well as fiction for moms and parenting and other books of interest.)

Reading is a life skill successful kids should know (and enjoy!).

Tip 2: Set Goals

Goal setting is a powerful tool to keep us on the road to success. Let’s write our desires and aspirations down on paper or keep a digital copy on our computers. We take responsibility for trying to achieve them rather than daydream about them.

For instance, when school begins each year, my kids write down their goals for that academic year. It might be trying to improve on a subject they’ve struggled with or finding a way to pay for private ski lessons when the money isn’t in the family budget. These goal lists are individually tailored to each child according to their interests and ambitions.

Having a clear horizon makes it easier to take steps toward it. In other words, goals trigger behavior, which is exactly why I firmly believe in practicing this skill.

Goals are a work in progress, but they can also create a sense of purpose and direction in our lives. They help keep us motivated and ward off procrastination.

Tip 3: Develop Strong People Skills

The majority of my kids find it easy to socialize in public, but I have two that are much more introverted and painfully shy. Although I know that working a crowd may never be in their comfort zone, I believe it’s still important for kids to develop strong people skills—the ability to behave well and interact comfortably with others so they can at least hold their own and build their confidence over time.

At the top of my list is using good manners. Words like “please” and “thank you” will never go out of style and always leave a good impression on others. Solid communication skills are the foundation of building strong people skills and better personal and business relationships.

Words like please and thank you will never go out of style!

I believe the art of better communication can be fostered at home. There are dozens of daily opportunities to teach your child how to develop empathy, become better listeners, and practice patience and understanding.

Combining the many occasions to work on social skills throughout childhood can help strengthen this important and necessary tool. With the ability to communicate and interact easily with others, children will learn to surround themselves with like-minded and positive individuals during school and as adults.

Tip 4: Cultivate Self-Care

I struggled with infertility for over five years, so my husband and I decided to adopt. A year to the day after we brought our newborn daughter home, I gave birth to our first son, followed by two more births, so I was a mother to four children under three. There was barely time for me to take showers, let alone time for other self-care routines.

Thankfully, I changed gears before baby number five arrived. I realized that taking better care of myself—in mind, body, and soul—was important. Sacrificing the sacred time I needed to replenish my energy and well-being regularly wasn’t helping my children or me.

The best part is that I no longer feel guilty about taking this time for just me—I’m comfortable prioritizing self-care. I believe making time for myself every day is what gives me the desire and stamina to enjoy the ups and downs of parenting, volunteer in my kids’ schools and our church, and to be able to work full-time doing a job that I love as well as sustain a thriving freelance career in writing.

Ariana Ayu, author of The Magic of Mojo: The Creative Power Behind Success, shares her thoughts on cultivating self-care in Why Self-Care is Critical to Long-Lasting Success,

“Practicing daily self-care is critical to your health and well-being. When you’re out of your mojo, learning to relax and nurture yourself is one of the biggest gifts you can give yourself; in fact, sometimes it’s all you can do.”

Ariana Ayu

When moms take care of themselves rather than sacrifice their needs, we set our children up for great success due to our positive examples.

Generational Gifts

          If you would like to foster your children’s independence and self-esteem and help your child succeed in life, instill these four lifelong skills: reading, setting goals, dealing well with people, and taking care of themselves.

These skills are essential when your children are in school and college, on the job and at home with spouses/partners, and when raising their own children to be independent, self-confident, and successful—and so on and so on…

What successful traits are you instilling in your children? Share your thoughts in the comment section.